Seven Things and More I Learned from Osato Chemicals
* A glass of champagne in the morning adds a sparkle to the day.
* A belief in healthy chests fosters a belief in more sparkle.
* Mr Osato's previous employment was as an x-ray techie, a post from which he was dismissed because of unsafe exposure procedures.
* Osato Chemicals has a huge class action suit for exposing its executive suite employees to daily doses of radiation. Mr Osato denies this, noting that he has a lead-lined desk.
* Typewriters can multi-task as various subtle surveillance devices.
* Osato Chemicals job descriptions for elevator operators: "Must have a suitable villainous look, preferably with a nice scar."
* Osato Chemicals outsourcing employment manager SPECTRE has very lax processes for vetting employees with weakness for ex-sailors with commas over their right eyebrow and preference for silly dialogue.
* Be especially on guard when your Osato Chemicals pilot wears a parachute and goggles, sets the autopilot and applies lipstick. The later is red flag Level One courtesy of pilfered SPECTRE handbook 'Free Expensive Falls' #532-11. All number-11 operatives are masters of this red flag.
* To avoid Japanese police investigations, kill foreign managing directors on Osato Chemicals parking area, preferably before main entrance. Said managing directors should be completely oblivious to cars creeping from six o'clock position.
